Friday, May 30, 2008

Too Much, Too Mean!

Sometimes by Rimfrost

ITS THE END OF MONTH ALREADY. End of May, the fifth month.. and now we enter June. so.. so.. hmm... so what??? i really have no idea... as far as im concerned, nothing special occurred to me in this month. i guess so.. well, nothing to worry, coz im not gonna write a boring thing, or this fucking feeling thing. got called from my sister last couple days, told me to come back home, to settle some kind of 'thing'. and i will soon. but dun wory, i will let you know when i'll be gone. and the problem is, its not like i dun like to be back home, but its like i live in cave.. no internet, no pc, i mean my own pc. without internet, there's no life to me... no fun at all.. urghh. got two laptops at home, but look like from the past few centuries.. so damned slow with zillion virus inside. and the other one, quite ok, but has screen problem, my sis used it to play some sort of games.. and got the internet too, but its like never appear to me, can u imagined that live in 20th centuries and still using dial-up... oh gawd.. and now you know, im not what u think. and i dont wanna think that u think... arghh.. just dun think ok! full stop.

And by the way, while my sis phoned me, i just made up my mind and tried to push her a little to buy a new pc... with another agenda behind my dirty head, i told her that the price very low for now, and she can get the new and high performance pc (actually for my own satisfaction, she doesn't know anything about this tech thing) with budget below rm1k.. then she said ok, sound unsuspicious at all to me. and thats mean she doesn't suspect anything which is good for me. but then i suggested her, up the budget a little and get 17" LCD wide screen... un-surely, i said around 300 bucks when she asked. and then, greedily, i said, no one used 17", its too small, try 19" and above. "how much? " she asked. spontaneously i said, after sum up all parts, around rm2k.. thats it. and then she asked me again, "do you have money?" naively i told her, i got a few bucks and the rest she need to add up to.. then i just heard the sigh from the other end of the line, heavy sigh i guess.. ooo i knew it. my mission was totally failed. mission unaccomplished. abort the mission now.. before my hope going to die. i will not let my hope die without the last wish come true... huhu~~

And then, she gave me explanation which is i deserved to know, she need to hold the money, used for the right and bla bla bla.. im not quite listening though.. she need to paid the house loan, she bought a new house and still under construction, i never saw it. but i knew its true. and then she need to pay the insurance, i dunno how many insurance she have by now, the last i heard she got 5 insurances while i got none. well, felt my life doesnt worth a penny. and then, got investment to pay and play.. quite surprised when she told me that, she knew nothing about that but got guts to invest.. more and more reasons she gave to me... well, her money, she pleased to do anything...

After long explanation, i just questioned her, "so?"...long paused... "may be next time, and i just came back from chiang mai." steadily, happily she answered me. i thought she was bluffing, sadly its true. and that steady and cool statement left me with this (!)... huge one. felt like the lightning strike straight to my heart. she never told me that, and moreover she brought my youngest brother with her.. i'm so fucking jealous. why she doesnt take me instead him. i got two points to defend myself, first, surely i know better than my brother. and second, i never flight!! urghhhhh... u know, i can get crazy when i recall that conversation. i tried to hide my jealousy and asked her what she got for me... but then again, un-sin-ly she said "nothing, i dunno what to buy, i just go around the town and bla bla..", she tried to tell a story that she met a one malay girl, travel alone... but i stopped her. arrgh i dun care anymore... listened to her story just make my day become worse and worse... and nothing interesting about that.

ooo shit, supposed im wanna write sumthin else.. but suddenly i came up with this bored story that no one will listen. sorry, bear with it! need to stop by now. its subuh already.

background musics:
Jack Johnson - Sleep Through The Static, Upside down, Sitting waiting wishing... and etc.
Radiohead - High and Dry, Creep
Def Leppard - Love Bites
Hillsong United Live - Till I See You

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